你越夸孩子越优秀!孩子的未来,藏在父母的嘴里!
<div class="wx_rich_media_content" id="jsWxContainer"><p style="margin-right: 8px;margin-left: 8px;outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8);text-align: right;line-height: 1.5em;"><br></p><p style="margin-right: 8px;margin-left: 8px;outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8);text-align: right;line-height: 1.5em;"><br></p><section data-role="outer" label="Powered by 135editor.com" style="outline: 0px; letter-spacing: 0.544px; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8); font-family: -apple-system-font, system-ui, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><section data-tools="135编辑器" data-id="89224" style="outline: 0px;"><section style="margin: 10px auto; outline: 0px;"><section style="margin-top: -16px; padding: 30px; outline: 0px; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; background-color: rgb(242, 244, 245); border-radius: 10px;"><section style="margin-top: 5px; outline: 0px; font-family: mp-quote, -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: normal;"><strong style="outline: 0px; color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><span style="outline: 0px; font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; caret-color: rgb(110, 110, 110);"><strong style="font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px;">你骂孩子,他不会停止爱你,但会停止爱自己</strong>。</span></strong><br style="outline: 0px;"></section><section style="margin-top: 15px; outline: 0px; font-family: -apple-system-font, system-ui, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; letter-spacing: 0.544px; min-height: 1em; text-align: right;"><span style="outline: 0px; color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong style="outline: 0px;">——萨姐</strong></span></section></section><section style="margin-right: 8px; margin-bottom: -30px; margin-left: 8px; outline: 0px; width: 556px; text-align: center;"><br style="outline: 0px;"></section></section></section></section><section data-role="outer" label="Powered by 135editor.com" style="outline: 0px; letter-spacing: 0.544px; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8); font-family: -apple-system-font, system-ui, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><section data-tools="135编辑器" data-id="89224" style="outline: 0px;"><section style="outline: 0px;"><section data-width="100%" style="margin-bottom: -30px; outline: 0px; width: 556px; text-align: center;"><br style="outline: 0px;"></section><p style="margin-top: 25px; margin-bottom: -30px; outline: 0px; width: 556px; text-align: center; line-height: 2em;"><span style="outline: 0px; color: rgb(123, 127, 131); font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.5px; text-align: right; font-size: 13px;">作者:春雨布谷</span></p><p style="margin-top: 25px; margin-bottom: -30px; outline: 0px; width: 556px; text-align: center; line-height: 2em;"><span style="outline: 0px; font-size: 13px;"><span style="color: rgb(123, 127, 131); font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.5px; text-align: right;">原创首发:萨提亚育儿(ID:</span><span style="color: rgb(123, 127, 131); font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.5px;">satiryuer</span><span style="color: rgb(123, 127, 131); font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.5px; text-align: right;">)</span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 25px; margin-bottom: -30px; outline: 0px; width: 556px; text-align: center;"><br></p></section></section></section><p style="margin-right: 8px;margin-left: 8px;outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8);text-align: right;line-height: 1.5em;"><br></p><section style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-family: 微软雅黑, Helvetica, 微软雅黑, Arial, sans-serif;font-size: 16px;display: flex;justify-content: center;"><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section><section style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(142, 142, 142);"><br></section></section><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">昨天去邻居家串门,又目睹一场“争端”。</span></p><section style="margin: 5px 8px 25px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">她家爸爸正在辅导儿子写作业,发现其中有几处错误,便铁青着脸审问儿子:</span></section><blockquote class="js_blockquote_wrap" data-type="2" data-url="" data-author-name="" data-content-utf8-length="34" data-source-title=""><section class="js_blockquote_digest"><section><p style="margin: 5px 16px 25px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“这么简单的数都算错,你脑子被狗啃了!”</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 25px 16px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“说!这道题应该怎么做!”</span></strong></p></section></section></blockquote><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">寥寥几句斥责,把家里的气氛瞬间降至冰点,被爸爸高分贝呵斥后的儿子,神色慌张纠结,梗着脖子耷拉着脑袋,结结巴巴说不出话来。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">邻居说,孩子最近学习不专心,动不动就出错,他们家骂孩子,已经是家常便饭。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">我忍不住提醒:“你们这么骂孩子,他就不出错了吗?”</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">邻居回答:“还是照样错,但是自己真的是生气,实在是忍不住。”</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">是啊,如果痛骂一顿,孩子就出息了,那岂不是所有的孩子都能成为牛顿了?</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">父母之所以骂孩子,无非是把内心深处的焦虑,投射到了孩子身上,担心那个不够优秀的孩子,步入自己人生的后尘。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">这种潜意识里的担忧,其实暗藏着的,是对自己人生的不满。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">父母应该明确一点:</span><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);">骂孩子,没有积极价值,只有消极作用。</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">这种伴随着自己强烈负面情绪产生的语言暴力,尽管披上了“为了孩子好”的锦衣,但仍旧无法改变它是一种伤害的本质。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><span style="outline: 0px;"> </span><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgb(6, 106, 96);"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(63, 63, 63);font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 0.5px;font-family: 微软雅黑;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(255, 255, 255);letter-spacing: 1px;"><span style="outline: 0px; font-size: 16px; font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light; background-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); line-height: 24px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;line-height: 25.6px;text-indent: 32px;"><span style="outline: 0px; line-height: 28px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-size: 24px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;">01</strong></strong></span></strong></span></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);">你越骂,孩子越怂</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">作家吴晓乐笔下曾经写过一个男孩钟国衍的故事。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">阿衍出生于一个普通家庭,他有一个特别强势暴躁的母亲。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">每每母亲生气发怒,总免不了要臭骂儿子一番。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;"></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">由于阿衍面临升学,成绩又不够理想,母亲便请来家教辅导儿子功课。</span></p><section style="margin: 5px 8px 25px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">面对成绩迟迟无法提升的儿子,母亲总是歇斯底里地咒骂:</span></section><blockquote class="js_blockquote_wrap" data-type="2" data-url="" data-author-name="" data-content-utf8-length="30" data-source-title=""><section class="js_blockquote_digest"><section><section style="margin: 5px 16px 25px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“你就是个废物!你的脑子被猪吃掉了!”</span></strong></section><section style="margin: 25px 16px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“你太给我丢脸了!”</span></strong></section></section></section></blockquote><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">这些夹杂着重度侮辱性字眼的词汇,就像一把把刀子,不停地在孩子心上划一刀,再划一刀。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">男孩看不见的内心世界,早就千疮百孔,伤痕斑斑。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">长期生活在充满负面语言和消极情绪的环境下,阿衍的眼睛里空洞无光,脸上没有青春男孩的笑容,只有数不尽的哀伤和沉默,伴随他成长。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;width: 100%;height: auto;"></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">有心理学研究表明,情绪伤害带给孩子的痛苦,不亚于肉体上的伤害。</span></p><section style="margin: 5px 8px 25px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">父母骂孩子,虽没有使用肢体暴力,但是却用一种更隐秘,更彻底,更可怕的方式,持续性地伤害孩子心灵。</span></strong></span></section><blockquote class="js_blockquote_wrap" data-type="2" data-url="" data-author-name="" data-content-utf8-length="92" data-source-title=""><section class="js_blockquote_digest"><section><section style="margin: 5px 16px 25px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">他们会胆小、懦弱,为了讨好父母,卑微地迎合他人,压抑自己;</span></strong></section><section style="margin: 25px 16px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">他们会低自尊,没有价值感,漠视自己的需求,任由他人摆布;</span></strong></section><section style="margin: 25px 16px; line-height: 2em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">他们会丧失被爱的感受,缺乏安全感,走入一个孤独、冰冷、自我封闭的牢笼。</span></strong></section></section></section></blockquote><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">正如网上看到一句话:</span><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);">“<strong>你骂孩子,他不会停止爱你,但会停止爱自己。”</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">此外,脑科学领域也有相关研究证实,经常挨骂的孩子,大脑发育更缓慢,智商更低,人际交往能力更差。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">父母越是缺乏情绪控制能力,越凶狠地骂孩子,越是把孩子逼进一条暗无天日的绝境,终生背负语言暴力留下的层层伤疤。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong><strong style="outline: 0px;"><span style="outline: 0px;"> </span><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgb(6, 106, 96);"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(63, 63, 63);font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 0.5px;font-family: 微软雅黑;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(255, 255, 255);letter-spacing: 1px;"><span style="outline: 0px; font-size: 16px; font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light; background-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); line-height: 24px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;line-height: 25.6px;text-indent: 32px;"><span style="outline: 0px; line-height: 28px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-size: 24px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;">02</strong></strong></span></strong></span></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong>你敢夸,孩子就敢优秀</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">同样的教育情境下,父母如何对待孩子,会决定孩子迈入不同的人生方向,浸染上不同的性格色彩。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">在鼓励和赞赏中成长的孩子,骨子里的自信和底气,是他们跨越障碍和困境,飞越平庸的力量之源。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">印象特别深刻的,是看到百度CEO李彦宏女儿Brenda的一段采访。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">镜头中的她,甜笑嫣然,落落大方,谈起父亲对自己的影响,毫不掩饰崇拜和感激。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">有一次参加一个活动,她当时特别害怕,但是李彦宏看到女儿的退缩,并没有丝毫厌烦和斥责,而是不断给予支持和鼓励,帮助女儿捡拾信心,用胆识和勇气武装自己。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;"></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“没什么好怕的,你要有信心!”</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">通过不断地帮助女儿树立自信,推动着她一步一步完善自己,成就自己,变得更加优秀和强大。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">看到他们父女相处的细节,我深切感受到:</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong>父母语言的无穷魅力,它可以变成一种支撑力,引导孩子越来越积极、努力、卓越。</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">有一个小男孩,指着月球对妈妈说:“将来我长大了,一定要到月球上去!”</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">妈妈没有嘲笑,而是抚摸着男孩的头回答道:“好啊,那你一定要记得回来哦!”</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">二十年后,男孩成为历史上首位登上月球的宇航员,他的名字叫阿姆斯特朗。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">有一位“丑丑”的少年,偏偏想要当演员,他不停地折腾着参加各类比赛。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">父母没有否定和打击,而是一路支持和鼓励,把少年“夸”得一直认为自己真的是帅哥。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;"></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">后来,他的舞台梦实现了,越来越多的观众喜欢上这名颜值独特,情商高,幽默搞笑的大男孩,他就是杨迪。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">心理学上有一个<strong>“贴标签效应”,</strong>指的就是某种评价对个体心理活动的一种影响。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">父母给予积极的评价,用正向积极的语言描述孩子的行为表现,对孩子心理来说,就是一种肯定和正面标签,激励孩子往更好的方向发展。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">反之,如果父母最终吐露的评价,总是消极和负面的,会让孩子给自己贴上负面标签,很难甩掉,并形成消极的负强化,贻误孩子发展。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong><strong style="outline: 0px; color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><span style="outline: 0px;"> </span></strong></strong></span><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgb(6, 106, 96);"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(63, 63, 63);font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 0.5px;font-family: 微软雅黑;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(255, 255, 255);letter-spacing: 1px;"><span style="outline: 0px; font-size: 16px; font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light; background-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); line-height: 24px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;line-height: 25.6px;text-indent: 32px;"><span style="outline: 0px; line-height: 28px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-size: 24px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;">03</strong></strong></span></strong></span></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong>你的嘴,就是孩子的命</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">看过一个令人抓狂的视频,隔着屏幕都对老父亲的崩溃感同身受。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“九九等于几啊!九九四十五你说我生气不?”</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;width: 100%;height: auto;"></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">老父亲无奈中带着哭腔,对于女儿的作业束手无策。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">身为父母,我们都肩负着事业和生活的双重压力,很多时候,面对“屡教不改”的孩子,总是很容易失去耐心;</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">但正是这些关键时刻,正是父母自我成长的契机,也是带给孩子正能量和爱的特别时刻。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">每每忍不住骂孩子时,请牢记遵守下面几个原则,一起与孩子成长。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong>1)不给孩子贴负面标签</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">“笨”、“猪”、“智商低”、“你干什么都不行”,这种带着强烈贬低和侮辱人格的词汇,请从自己的字典里面删除。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">你可以描述自己的感受,描述看到的问题,比如,“我看到你的数学题错了两个”而不是“你笨得算数都算不好”,平和而清晰的语言,有助于孩子看清问题,接受改变,而不是自卑和怀疑自己。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong>2)情绪泛滥时,可以离开一会儿</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">当情绪值达到顶点时,特别容易说出不理智的话,这个时候,最好的方法是远离现场,给情绪一个缓冲,平复情绪后,再与孩子进行沟通。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">情绪控制能力是能够通过练习和自我调节,不断学习和增强的。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">改变与孩子的沟通方式,从做一个高情商的父母开始。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong>3)尊重孩子的成长节奏</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">归根结底,父母之所以忍不住责骂孩子,原因在于大人的脚步太快了,而孩子的脚步太慢了。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">成人早已理解的知识,洞悉的道理,对尚且年幼的孩子而言,就是力不从心的。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">只有我们放慢脚步,找到孩子的节奏,亲子沟通才能合拍,消除不和谐的声音。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">每种花都有花期,会绽放在不同的领域,学会欣赏不同的色彩和美丽,放下焦虑的心,父母不必星夜赶路,孩子的未来自有无限可能。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px; color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><span style="outline: 0px;"> </span><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;color: rgb(6, 106, 96);"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;letter-spacing: 1px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(63, 63, 63);font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 0.5px;font-family: 微软雅黑;"><strong style="outline: 0px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;color: rgb(255, 255, 255);letter-spacing: 1px;"><span style="outline: 0px;font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;background-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);line-height: 24px;"><strong style="outline: 0px;line-height: 25.6px;text-indent: 32px;"><span style="outline: 0px;line-height: 28px;white-space: pre-wrap;"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong style="outline: 0px;font-size: 24px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;">04</strong></strong></span></strong></span></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">亲子对话,看似是生活中的小事,延伸到家庭教育,就是关系到孩子人格建立、性格塑造的大事。</span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong>教育孩子,不是用高分贝的语言暴力,熄灭他们心中的火焰,打压他们的发展;</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;color: rgb(0, 122, 170);"><strong>而是点燃一盏灯,传递一份力量,助力他们找到自己的人生。</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 25px 8px; line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 16px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 1px;">愿每一位父母,都能学好沟通这门课,从改变自己的语言开始,温暖孩子的童年时光,照亮漫漫人生路。</span></p><p style="margin-top: 25px; outline: 0px; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.544px; text-align: center;"><span style="outline: 0px;font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 1px;">-END-</span></p><p style="margin-top: 25px; outline: 0px; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.544px; text-align: justify; margin-left: 8px; margin-right: 8px;"><span style="outline: 0px; color: rgb(123, 127, 131); font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; text-align: left;">本文首发平台:萨提亚育儿(ID:satiryuer),传播萨提亚、NLP、催眠、家排、NLP教练技术、亲密关系等实用心理学,与大师相遇,让心理学快速改变你的人生</span></p><section style="margin-top: 5px; margin-bottom: 5px; outline: 0px; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, Arial, sans-serif; letter-spacing: 0.544px; text-align: right;"><section style="outline: 0px;"><section style="margin-top: 5px;outline: 0px;"><section style="outline: 0px;display: flex;justify-content: flex-end;align-items: center;"><section style="outline: 0px;width: 22px;"><section style="margin-top: 15px;outline: 0px;width: 22px;"><br></section></section></section></section></section></section>转载声明:本文转载自「萨提亚育儿」,搜索「satiryuer」即可关注,[<a target="_blank" href="https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/3L4WUUwtWinnYo4xntRNQw">阅读原文</a>]。</div><p></p>
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