邯郸“3名初中生霸凌并杀害同学”事件：父母如何尽早发现霸凌？丨热点看台
<div class="wx_rich_media_content" id="jsWxContainer"><section style="box-sizing: border-box; text-align: justify; font-size: 16px;" data-mpa-powered-by="yiban.io"><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;height: 325px;vertical-align: middle;font-size: 16px;letter-spacing: 0.578px;text-align: center;text-wrap: wrap;width: 578px;"></span></section></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-family: PingFangSC-light; font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.7;">又是一起未成年人实施的恶性霸凌案件：邯郸市肥乡区三个初中生残忍杀害同班同学小光（化名），并将尸体掩埋在废弃蔬菜大棚内。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.7;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.7;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.7;">被发现的小光，“脸被铁锹铲得面目全非”，小光的姑姑王女士在接受记者采访时说，“如果把铁锹比喻成刀的话，刀刀致命”。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><section style="text-align: center; margin-top: 10px; line-height: 0; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;width: 90%;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="text-align: center; justify-content: center; display: flex; flex-flow: row; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="display: inline-block;width: 90%;vertical-align: top;background-color: rgba(232, 232, 232, 0.27);padding: 9px 9px 9px 14px;align-self: flex-start;flex: 0 0 auto;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="color: rgb(160, 160, 160);font-size: 13px;text-align: left;font-family: PingFangSC-light;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);box-sizing: border-box;">●</span> 警方调取的监控录像寻找小光的行迹</p></section></section></section><section style="font-family: PingFangSC-light; font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">而被调查的三名嫌疑人在警方调取监控后，面对询问还可以冷静的矢口否认见过被害人。作案心狠手辣，处理心思缜密，被问冷静否认，老到的行为与其十三四岁的年龄，形成了强烈的反差。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="text-align: center; margin-top: 10px; line-height: 0; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;width: 90%;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="text-align: center; justify-content: center; display: flex; flex-flow: row; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="display: inline-block;width: 90%;vertical-align: top;background-color: rgba(232, 232, 232, 0.27);padding: 9px 9px 9px 14px;align-self: flex-start;flex: 0 0 auto;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="color: rgb(160, 160, 160);font-size: 13px;text-align: left;font-family: PingFangSC-light;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);box-sizing: border-box;">●</span> 被警方抓获的3名嫌疑人</p></section></section></section><section style="font-family: PingFangSC-light; font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 23px; color: rgb(104, 130, 164); line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">被忽视的求助声</strong></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-family: PingFangSC-light; font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">在这起事件中，我们特别留意到：<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">小光的家里人对记者说，小光平常很乖，经常自己洗衣服做饭做家务，此前孩子表示不想上学，但他们没有当回事，还劝孩子去学校上学。家人也问过孩子是否被人欺负，孩子则表示没有。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">“我们以为孩子贪玩，并没有当回事，后来才知道孩子在学校受到了霸凌。”小光的父亲王先生说到。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="text-align: center; margin-top: 10px; line-height: 0; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;width: 90%;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="text-align: center; justify-content: center; display: flex; flex-flow: row; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="display: inline-block;width: 90%;vertical-align: top;background-color: rgba(232, 232, 232, 0.27);padding: 9px 9px 9px 14px;align-self: flex-start;flex: 0 0 auto;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="color: rgb(160, 160, 160);font-size: 13px;text-align: left;font-family: PingFangSC-light;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);box-sizing: border-box;">●</span> 小光生前照片（来自新黄河视频号）</p></section></section></section><section style="font-family: PingFangSC-light; font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">当小光提出“不想上学”时，很有可能已经遭受了相当长时间的霸凌，从最开始轻微的日常摩擦逐步升级，本来有很多可以干预和介入的机会，但老师和父母都错过了。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">据华中师范大学教育治理现代化课题组曾发布过的一则调查报告显示：遭受欺凌后，<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">选择“跟父母说”的占比仅有11.7%，</span></strong>选择“跟老师说”的比例略高，不过也只有14.3%。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">小光也许已经真的“走投无路”了，所以才说“不想上学”，父母不当回事的声音，对孩子来说也许已在内心盘桓已久，鼓足所有的勇气才说出。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">“我们以为孩子贪玩，并没有当回事。”（忽略）</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">“你不惹他，他怎么会惹你呢！你也反思一下自己的问题”（指责）</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">“你要去告诉老师呀！”（踢皮球）</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">“真没用！他打你，你就打回去呀”（评价孩子软弱）</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">孩子在面对父母说出的这些话时，还在承受的是来自同学的威胁，“敢说出去，下次打死你！”指责与恐惧并存，忽略和无助同在，在此处境中孩子只能默默忍受下去。</span></strong></p></section><section style="font-family: PingFangSC-light; font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 23px; color: rgb(104, 130, 164); line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">更隐性的教师霸凌</strong></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">比起学生之间的霸凌，教师对学生的霸凌则更加复杂和隐性。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">过去，暴力体罚学生的行为已经被禁止了，但变相的体罚经常发生：罚站、罚抄几十遍、逐出教室、鼓动同学们孤立、羞辱、冷漠等等。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">身体上被打的伤痕会让人触目惊心，但心灵上的伤痕却常常不被看见。尤其是面对语言上的羞辱，单次看某场师生的对话，父母和老师可能都会觉得，“你做得不好，还说不得了”“这也太脆弱了吧”……<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">却忽视了</span></strong><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">持续的语言羞辱在精神上的极大折磨，尤其还当着全班同学的面，几乎就是把一个孩子的尊严按在地上摩擦。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;"><br></span></strong></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;width: 90%;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">不同于面对同学之间的霸凌，父母更认为教师做得对，</span></strong>“老师为啥总是说你，不说别人，肯定有你做得不对的地方”，“老师重视你，希望你改正，也是你把她惹生气她才这样”……父母在面对老师的时候，会本能的站在教育者一方。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">在一席的演讲上，友乐青春教育工作室的主理人钟馨乐就分享过，“欺凌并不只是某一些‘坏孩子’做出的反社会行为，恰恰，它在很多时候是一种社会化行为。孩子努力地让自己符合某一类被认可的文化标准，并驱逐、排斥那些不合格、不一样的同伴，从而赢得更多认同、权利和社交地位。”</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">老师同样如此，单一的价值体系，让符合标准的个体获得权利和尊重，让不符合标准的个体被边缘化，或者用强权和暴力对待。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;width: 90%;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">班级里教师拥有最高权利，如果一个教师厌恶某个学生，也很容易引起群体效应，让这个学生被排挤和嘲笑。</span></strong>在这个几十平米人挤人的不友好的教室里，一个孩子每天都要待上十几个小时，可想其心理压力有多大。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 23px; color: rgb(104, 130, 164); line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family:PingFangSC-light;box-sizing: border-box;"></span><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">父母如何做</strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">可能避免孩子被霸凌？</p></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">在美国政府反霸凌官网上提供了一些被霸凌的先兆：</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="display: inline-block;border-width: 1px;border-style: solid;border-color: rgb(245, 245, 245);background-color: rgb(245, 245, 245);width: 90%;height: auto;padding: 10px;box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="display: flex;width: 100%;flex-flow: column;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="z-index: auto; transform-origin: center center; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="margin-top: 17px; margin-bottom: 31px; opacity: 1; box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="text-align: justify; color: rgb(160, 160, 160); padding-right: 20px; padding-left: 20px; font-size: 15px; line-height: 2; font-family: PingFangSC-light; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 不明伤痕</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 衣服、书籍、电子产品或珠宝丢失或毁坏</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 经常头痛或胃痛，感觉不舒服或装病</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 饮食习惯的改变，例如突然不吃饭或暴饮暴食</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 难以入睡或经常做噩梦</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 成绩下降、对功课失去兴趣或不想上学</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 突然与朋友断交或逃避社交场合</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 无助感或自尊心降低</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 自毁行为，例如离家出走、自残或谈论自杀</span></strong></p></section></section></section></section></section></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">父母们除了要留心观察自己的孩子外，<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">最重要的是要让你的孩子感受到，你能真正地去帮助Ta解决这个大麻烦。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">青少年生命复元之前写过一篇文章《孩子被欺凌后为什么不求助？“说了也没用！”》，<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);box-sizing: border-box;">孩子很多时候不肯说，除了是受到威胁外，更重要的是他们认为这件事无解，父母和老师都不能帮助到自己。</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">大部分时候，老师和父母也确实轻视了孩子的求助：</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">老师面对这个情况，通常是让霸凌者写道歉信、保证书，请父母谈谈，调换座位等。这些无关痛痒的方式，不仅无法帮助到这个孩子，还有可能使得霸凌变本加厉。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">好一点的家长，可能是约谈对方父母给孩子道歉，并给孩子转校；但不少家长在繁忙的工作中，“多一事不如少一事”，或者叫孩子自己打回去。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 22px; color: rgb(104, 130, 164); line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;">更要注意自己的孩子</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;">是否有霸凌他人的迹象</span></p></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">如果孩子出现以下情况，他们可能在霸凌他人：</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="display: inline-block;border-width: 1px;border-style: solid;border-color: rgb(245, 245, 245);background-color: rgb(245, 245, 245);width: 90%;height: auto;padding: 10px;box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="display: flex;width: 100%;flex-flow: column;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="z-index: auto; transform-origin: center center; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="margin-top: 17px; margin-bottom: 31px; opacity: 1; box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="text-align: justify; color: rgb(160, 160, 160); padding-right: 20px; padding-left: 20px; font-size: 15px; line-height: 2; font-family: PingFangSC-light; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 参与打架或吵架</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 有霸凌他人的朋友</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 越来越有攻击性</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 经常被送到校长办公室或留校</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 有来历不明的额外钱财或新物品</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 把自己的问题归咎于他人</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 不为自己的行为承担责任</span></strong></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);">· 争强好胜并担心他们的声誉或受欢迎程度</span></strong></p></section></section></section></section></section></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">不要以为自己家孩子成绩好就不会霸凌别人，在电影《少年的你》中，霸凌者魏莱看起来漂亮乖巧、家境优渥，成绩也很优秀，老师上课经常表扬她，按名次排座位她也总坐在前面，求陈念不要报警时也说：“我是要考北大的。”</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">但是她同时也逼得同学胡小蝶跳楼自杀，叫上其他同学殴打陈念。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;width: 90%;height: auto;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="color: rgb(104, 130, 164);"><strong>在许多人的刻板印象中，成绩好就是自律听话的乖乖女，乖乖女就是温柔、上进、品德好的；成绩差、到处玩、不求上进，染头发的就是坏女孩。这两种肤浅又愚蠢的刻板印象早就该打破了！</strong></span></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="wxart_image" wx-style="display:inline-block;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 100%;width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></section></section><section style="font-size: 23px; color: rgb(104, 130, 164); line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family:PingFangSC-light;box-sizing: border-box;"></span><span style="box-sizing: border-box;">结语</span></strong><span style="font-family:PingFangSC-light;box-sizing: border-box;"></span></p></section><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">邯郸“3名初中生霸凌并杀害同学”事件，令人震惊、愤怒和惋惜。近几年，几乎每个月甚至每周，都会在新闻上看到非常多霸凌事件。但更多隐形的霸凌，在看不见的地方每天上演。</p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;">希望各位父母要特别留意自己的孩子，不要成为受害者，也不要去当加害人！这是每一位父母的职责。</p></section><p style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p><section style="font-size: 17px; font-family: PingFangSC-light; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.7; padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section style="max-width: 100%;vertical-align: middle;display: inline-block;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;"><br></section></section><section powered-by="xiumi.us" style="margin-top: 10px; margin-bottom: 10px; letter-spacing: 0.578px; text-align: center; line-height: 0;"><br></section><section powered-by="xiumi.us" style="padding-right: 22px; padding-left: 22px; font-size: 12px; color: rgb(160, 160, 160); font-family: PingFangSC-light; line-height: 1.7; letter-spacing: 1px;"><p><br></p><p><br></p><p><br></p><p>主编/屈华</p><p>执行主编/言心</p><p>撰文/言心</p><p>视觉/日敦社设计</p></section><p powered-by="xiumi.us"><br style="letter-spacing: 0.578px;"></p><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br></p><p style="box-sizing: border-box;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;"></p></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-top: 10px;margin-bottom: 10px;line-height: 0;box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><br></section></section>转载声明：本文转载自「青少年生命复元」，搜索「QSNSMFY2021」即可关注，[<a target="_blank" href="https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/lwAYws9m-Up9vxwCSKEFOg">阅读原文</a>]。</div><p></p>
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